Erika Dreifus

A new Web site, lazyhousewife.com, seeks humorous, witty writers. “If you can come up with ridiculous cleaning ideas, such as strapping scrub brushes onto the bottom of your feet to clean a shower stall, and write a clever article about it, we need you!”

Pay rates are quite low ($13/article, maximum), but they are pay rates, and the articles they’re looking for are pretty short.

This is what they’re seeking:

“Silly Cleaning Tool ‘Invention’ Articles”

“Ridiculous Cleaning Articles”

“Fictitious News Stories”

“Funny Stories”

“Ridiculous Cleaning Idea”

“Ridiculous Cleaning Tips”

Note that submissions “should be ridiculous, witty, and creative–in fact, the more ridiculous, the better. This website is not meant to be taken seriously; its purpose is to give housewives (and others) a good laugh. But please remember…there is a difference between ridiculous and stupid.”

For details about the article categories, plus submission information, check the Web site.

Yesterday mid-morning I put the computer to “sleep” and headed over for a quick medical appointment (everything’s fine!). While I waited to hear my name called, I flipped through the magazine collection (doesn’t every writer do this?) and found an intriguing new offering: Wondertime. I liked it, so I’ve done a little bit of follow-up research.

According to its Web site, Wondertime, produced by the editors of Disney’s Family Fun, is dedicated to “helping parents nurture their children’s love of learning. A blend of how and why, Wondertime inspires moms of infants through 6-year-olds to see the world through the eyes of their children, and to celebrate the wonder of this all-too-fleeting time.”

Although the magazine is not accepting unsolicited work at the moment, the editors are currently looking for a particular kind of contribution: “For a new section of Wondertime in which parents swap their experiences, techniques, and general tricks of the parenting trade, we would like to hear your answers to the following question: What are your favorite ways to teach your child basic manners–please and thank you, friendly greetings, acceptable interruption techniques (Excuse me!), and other everyday niceties?” If your letter (with attribution) is published, you’ll receive $75. For more information/submission guidelines, click here.

Found this one on Chicago Craigslist:

“The online humor magazine FLYMF (www.flymf.com) is looking for submissions.

Criteria: We’re looking for pieces that are, well, funny. Take a look at the site to see the kind of stuff we publish. We like to think that we’re smart but not above being raunchy if the joke calls for it, but we could be full of it.

Send your fiction, essays, poetry, shorts, comics and movies to submissions@flymf.com.

Please send submissions in the text of an email. Profanity does not guarantee humor. No Onion ripoffs.

* Compensation: $1.00/100 words; maximum $20. Comics: $10. Poetry and movies: Variable. Payment on publication.”

Full announcement here.

Maybe it’s just me being hypercautious (something I’ve been called many times!) but I’m always a little skeptical of online job announcements from publications that don’t include a link to a website. Sometimes, however, just a little extra research can reassure me. Not only do I come to feel that I know the publication a little better (which certainly helps me if I actually do want to pitch an idea its way) but it just makes the publication itself seem more legitimate and professional.

Today, for instance, I saw an announcement on FreelanceWriting.com for World Scholar, “a news and lifestyle magazine for the over 13 million international students studying and living in the United States.” The magazine accepts articles, student profiles, and columns. As you’ll see if you read the announcement, columns (up to 900 words) pay $45; features pay $.10/word.

I thought about posting this for others who might be interested, but I didn’t want to do that without at least looking for the magazine first. And I think I found it. Here.